I needed this reminder. Labels From God.

lets get healthy, already!

I am totally covered in a rash. I am hoping it is from a zpack that I finished on tuesday last week. Or at worst from the laundry detergent- switched from ALL Free and Clear to ALL Free and Clear with OXI CLEAN. All I keep thinking is that we better figure it out and FAST! I am rather itchy and rather irritable... I mean who would not be grumpy with red bumps that itch appearing here and there and disappearing here and there. But even in this most uncomfortable of circumstances I must find a place of peace. I must be still. And let God be God.

I am reminded of the story, actually my four year old has been talking about this story since last Sunday at church, of Jesus healing the blind man.

John 9

New International Version (NIV)

Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind

"As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. 2 His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” 3 “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him. 4 As long as it is day, we must do the works of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. 5 While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.” 6 After saying this, he spit on the ground, made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes. 7 “Go,” he told him, “wash in the Pool of Siloam” (this word means “Sent”). So the man went and washed, and came home seeing. 8 His neighbors and those who had formerly seen him begging asked, “Isn’t this the same man who used to sit and beg?” 9 Some claimed that he was. Others said, “No, he only looks like him.” But he himself insisted, “I am the man.” 10 “How then were your eyes opened?” they asked. 11 He replied, “The man they call Jesus made some mud and put it on my eyes. He told me to go to Siloam and wash. So I went and washed, and then I could see.”

Jesus is my Healer and the Light of the World. I am so thankful that even in moments of pure frustration and defeat, I still have this truth. I will rest in Him and believe in the Word and Truth. I believe that having this rash is to make me realize all things can be worse and even while I am uncomfortable and feeling ill, I can still praise Him.

Being thankful that despite our illnesses that have tried to make us weak and have us struggle with little faith that we can plead the blood of Jesus over our home, over our chilren and ourselves and we will believe and expect to be healed. Our Father is amazing and faithful.

Holding on to the fact that He will heal me and when the healing comes, I will still be ready and expectant and thankful. I will not give up before the miracle. I will believe and listen.

a little holiday cheer

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Giving

First of all, I am NOT above it all.  I was out at 8pm til 130am doing my "black Friday" shopping mostly on Thursday night.  Who doesn't want a better deal and who doesn't want to shop earlier rather than later?  As it was, I did not get to sleep til after 230a and had to wake up by 8 (if Savi let us sleep in!

Abi (8) was super sweet when we were out shopping last night and admitted that it is fun to buy for other people but she likes it "a little bit more" when she is the one getting.  Who doesn't?!  Most people will not admit this, but leave it to a child to once again, make us reevaluate our feelings.  I love buying gifts for my children and I love being able to give to friends and family.  Here comes the "but"... I sure do LOVE receiving surprises- whether it is a book from a friend, a meal brought to our home, or of course, say, a new ring that sparkles ;-)

Abi has really gotten into this giving to other people and I know that we are so blessed. Despite her selfish wants (we are all born with) and despite being in this all-consuming age, she has the desire to help others.  She was given the opportunity to help assist in feeding the homeless around the Raleigh area with a church we were visiting.  Abi was so cute and offered up pineapple to each person who passed her serving dish.  My heart swelled with love and pride and I had to fight my overwhelming urge to leave my station serving chicken to hug my sweet girl.  I pray, had Savi been old enough, she too would have stood beside her big sister and offered up green beans.  

It wasn't that Abi had this overwhelming desire to feed people pineapple but she had the overwhelming desire to HELP and she was offering up LOVE on that spoon. Letting the people without homes know she CARES and though at 8 yrs old, she cant do much but she can certainly do SOMETHING.  

Such a reminder.  I am praying that this season is truly one of giving.  I agree we should be thrifty with our spending of new gadgets and whatnot... we do not need everything we want.  There is such a difference.  It is okay to tell your children they will not receive that iPad that all their friends seem to have... it is okay to tell your children 'NO' when they seem to have everything but still want more.  Let us learn to give to the needy and not treat them as 'others' undeserving of our time and effort.  Let us learn to hold open doors for strangers and smile at each other rather than avoid eye contact.  Let us learn to do something greater than we imagined for ourselves.

In Acts 20:35 we read that Jesus said it is more blessed to give than to receive.... 

Acts 20:35

New International Version (NIV)

³⁵ In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ ”

Acts 20:35

The Message (MSG)

^33-35 “ I've never, as you so well know, had any taste for wealth or fashion. With these bare hands I took care of my own basic needs and those who worked with me. In everything I've done, I have demonstrated to you how necessary it is to work on behalf of the weak and not exploit them. You’ll not likely go wrong here if you keep remembering that our Master said, ‘You’re far happier giving than getting.’”

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Giving PRIORITY to what TRULY matters

My husband and I will be married nine years in May. Which means that he and I have been together more than a decade.  Insane. Truly.  I am 31 and to realize that I have spent my entire twenties being a wife and a mother is amazing to me.  I know friends who are still single.  Some who are mothers but never committed to being a wife.  I can honestly say, that looking back at who I was before and looking in the mirror today...I am one thankful woman.  I am much better today than I was yesterday.  And that is how it is supposed to happen, right? We make a mistake yesterday and vow to do better today.  Tomorrow is undoubtedly filled with all the promises we say we will keep and all the ideas of a 'better' me in the future.

So what happens when you look back and realize, you have not been living up to the promises you have made?  I can tell you.  It just happened to me.  I felt weak, lazy, embarrassed, angry, hurt, and frustrated. But here I am...trying once again.  

God never said life would be easy as a Christian.  I was 23 when I truly gave my life to Christ.  I tried a year before that, and prayed to receive Christ... but it was more out of obligation to my husband.  The sweetest and most amazing man I have ever met.  I had wanted to be a Christian like he was and I wanted to be his wife.  I really thought that I was making a wise choice- the choice I was making was in my head and not in my heart.  We were married...we had a baby girl...and there I was, realizing how Great our God is as I crossed the threshold of the hospital exit and belted our precious baby girl into the carseat.  A change of heart occurred and I knew that finally, I was really saved.  Can I just mention the awesomeness of being baptized with your own child in church watching?!?!  She of course won't remember, as she was under a year old.  But still, amazing.

Life is not easy for any wife and mother.  There are obstacles, there are bills, stresses, illnesses that after taking its toll on every member in the household, you feel you have not been in contact with anyone, other than the doctors office, in well over five months.  At some point all the responsibilities and stressers have taken a piece of you all day, all week, all month... and here I am.  Without much left for anyone.  Especially my sweet and amazing husband.  

We had a conversation that I had envisioned would go one way and boy, did it totally go the opposite way.  We began to argue.  Finances and the holiday season can truly eat at a marriage that is being worn down by just every day life!  Has this happened, IS this happening to you?? You are not alone! I am here, in the same boat as so many other ladies. 

In the aftermath of our"conversation", a realization occurred to me...none of these reactions would be as harsh had I not stopped putting my marriage as my second priority... the first is God.  My whole focus and game plan had been skewed.  The children were at the top, then school- as I am in my senior year of a BA degree, and then came God and then somewhere under all the stress and all the 'to do' lists, was my sweet and amazing husband.  

Ugh.  

So began the week of trying to mend up myself before I could even begin to reconstruct my marriage.  Any spouse over time will begin to believe they are less important and less loved than everyone else when they are always getting leftovers.  Imagine, for those who tithe, God doesn't want your leftovers but your first fruits and he only wants it from a cheerful giver.  The same goes for our marriage.  Our spouse deserves us before we give our attention to the children, the bills, the lists, the work... 

I am struggling daily with making my husband a top priority. And it is hard to admit that.  I love him so much and just assumed he would always be there if he loves me as much as I do him.  Well, if I don't start showing him that I love him, he may be here physically in person but his heart will undoubtedly become closed off to me.  

I prayed this morning before opening my Bible and found myself reading Jude, who wrote a short letter warning Christians against false teachings and urges us to strengthen our faith and love, that priorities can easily fall out of line.  We are to build ourselves up in faith and pray, keeping ourselves in God's love (Jude 20-21). He writes of grumblers and faultfinders whom only seek out faults in others and situations.  We are not to boast and not to manipulate others for our gain (Jude 16).  Jude reminds us to pray and immerse ourselves in the Word and Truth... to help those who doubt, snatch people from the fire and SAVE them.  We are called to show mercy and to recognize and hate corruption (Jude 20-23).  

I realized that I had become a grumbler and a faultfinder.  Things we are warned about.  I realized that I spend more time putting out 'fires' within my own home and ignore those around us who need 'snatched from the fire' and need to know God's love and be saved (Jude 23).  God is not interested in how organized my home has become, how many people I smile at and am politely courteous to, nor does he care that I spend all my energy volunteering on committees and taking exams in school. He is interested in how many times I get my hands dirty and how many people I save and how much I love HIM and take care of what He has given to me... such as my marriage, my children, our family, the Church, the hurting people.  

I have been using a 'Couples Bible' filled with devotionals that speak life into a marriage. As I was reading Jude, I came across a devotional titled, Keeping Your Balance by Judith Briles.  She wrote, "There are going to be times when each of us is out of step at work or in our personal lives.  Just being open and receptive to the fact that our life is not going to be perfect helps bring perspective back into a person's life". Thank you , Lord.  I am right here and I got it... as I step back in line with a Heavenly Perspective rather than the worldly one.